Migrations: For Mark

I.
You asked what I meant
by "wildness of heart."
On my front deck
Among the trumpet vines,
A black-chinned hummingbird
Sees himself in my mirrored window-
But can't see us: my cat and me.
Bill turns himself inside out,
Warbling his come-here's
Like some fat bird in feline fur.
As the hummer hovers,
Admiring his own perfect form,
And cool arrogance,
Our own heavy lives
Levitate a little bit with him.
Hey-but that's nothing-get
This-black chins can't
Fly the mountains when seasons turn,
Yet up he shows when the right
Flowers come to bloom.
We know now how he migrates:
He rides on geese through Stevens Pass
Nestled in the down between their wings.
All of our humming birds
Ride geese through mountain passes.
I planted their trumpet vine
In recompense for that neat trick.

II.
My cat, for his part,
Lives his entire life inside.
Bill shares my bed.
He eats his kibble and suffers
Being brushed. He bites
Me hello and he bites me awake.
I reserve for him a special
Falsetto of endearment.
Just think how the great horned owl
In the corner pine would eat
Bill alive-much in the way
I would eat an ear of corn,
Turning him and gnawing,
Tearing loose juicy bits.
For that owl, for coyotes and pit bulls,
For neighborhood monsters in child form,
For the unbelievable tires of cars,
I keep poor Bill inside.
Bill never migrates anywhere at all.

III.
As for my part, Mark,
I turn away from death
And from disease, and also turn
To face them straight head-on.
I see snow-capped peaks
Pass far below. I hear
Pinions sweep through mountain skies,
And I feel the shoulder muscles
Pull us ever toward the sun.
As I ride this dream,
I turn away from the future
To hold this pen and to look for love
And to suck the nectar
From the red flowers of the trumpet vine.
I want wildness of the heart
And the safety of a warm windowsill.
I want a cure for this fear of cancer,
A reprieve from the great horned owl.
I want to admire myself in a mirror
That reflects the shining truth
Of this one moment,
And I want to hover and hum.

 
by Gerald Tiffany